14 Comments
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Geraldine A. V. Hughes's avatar

O WOW

I get your Void NOW

O WOW

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the Void's avatar

Wonderful!! I was afraid I'd lost you. Waking up to this comment had my eyelids soggy. Thanks for that. I don't often feel understood.

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Tee P's avatar

I was NOT expecting that twist. Well done! So simply written, too. And appropriately titled! Very nice!

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the Void's avatar

That's great to hear. Exactly what I was trying to do. Thanks for reading. So glad you enjoyed it! I was worried about it being a trash story, but I guess I did alright. 😁

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Amy Beeman's avatar

I knew it was gonna go sideways!! Didn’t see that coming though! Awesome job at building suspense. This gave me a similar feeling to Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery,” one of my favorite short stories. Good stuff!

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the Void's avatar

Lol. I just hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. I'm thrilled that you enjoyed it. I'll have to look "the Lottery" up. It sounds familiar but I can't place it. Thanks for reading!

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Amy Beeman's avatar

There was no rush! I don’t subscribe to The New Yorker but was able to open the link to “The “Lottery”. Hopefully you can too. The similarities are in the small town simple life characters and there is a ritual. Readers don’t really know what it is, but suspense builds, like in your story, and then the unexpected happens. https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1948/06/26/the-lottery

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the Void's avatar

Awesome!! Thank you for the link. I read through the Wikipedia page and, wow, huge compliment. Much appreciated!

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Neil Barker's avatar

I like the twists and turns this takes. I was not expecting this ending. Well done.

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the Void's avatar

Thank you, Neil 🙏 I appreciate you coming along for the ride. Glad you liked the story.

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Beth's avatar

...grin stretched across my face from ear to ear... the foreshadowing is brilliant. I never even saw it coming.

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the Void's avatar

Brilliant! 😁

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Beth's avatar

Hell of a conclusion. Well played, Sir, well played. When it hit me, I was like, OMG. It rang true. Thank you for sharing!

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the Void's avatar

Thank you with all my heart, Beth.

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